intruder in the house

We were all shocked and sickened to hear the story this week of the Connecticut doctor and his family who were brutally attacked inside their own home. Dr. William Petit Jr. and his wife Jennifer and their two daughters Hayley (17) and Michaela (11) were enjoying a night together in the peace and calm of their own home, when two men broke into the house, knocked out Dr. Petit with a baseball bat, tied him up and threw him in the basement, and then for several hours terrified and brutally tortured his wife and daughters before finally setting the house on fire, killing everyone except for Dr. Petit, who managed to break out of the basement just as the police and fire department arrived.

This is the kind of story that strikes horror into the heart of every man. It is absolutely the worst nightmare any of us could imagine. I am praying for Dr. Petit and asking for God's continued grace and strength- my heart goes out to this man. I cannot even begin to imagine how a man can survive such sorrow. It will be only by the grace of God.

A home is sacred- a place of refuge and peace and protection. A home is a families "shalom" where children should always feel the love and peace and joy of the Lord. It is a place where spiritual maturity should be nourished and encouraged and the family should thrive in an environment of growth and learning.

As a husband and father and the head of my home, I feel a heightened sense of responsibility for the welfare of my family. I see that God has given me stewardship over them and that I am to stand in the gap for them in prayer and to hold the vanguard against the work of the enemy.

When I first read this terrible account of the attack on this Connecticut family, I immediately thought of this teaching of Jesus found in Matthew 12:29:

"Or again, how can anyone enter a strong man's house and carry off his possessions unless he first ties up the strong man? Then he can rob his house."

In context Jesus is addressing the issue of spiritual battle- by implication He reveals here a very specific tactic of the enemy in destroying a home. He is saying that the way the enemy comes into a home and destroys everything of value in that home is by first tying up the strong man. The "strong man" is the head of the house- the man who is given responsibility to stand in the gap for his wife and kids. If the enemy can take the man out, he can have his way in the home.

The details of the abhorrent crime in this quiet community in Connecticut have sent shock waves across the world, but this teaching of Jesus highlights a more subtle and yet incredibly destructive spiritual parallel that I see happening in homes today at an alarming rate.

I see the remains of shattered lives and homes under attack almost weekly. I see men who have been bound up by pornography or workaholism or drug or alcohol abuse. I see men lured away from their wives and children and the responsibility that God has given them as the "strong man" in the home. I see good men, Christian men often, who know better and who have understood clearly the consequences of their behavior, throw it all to the wind and leave their families for greener grass or better promise or the attraction and thrill of an adulterous relationship.

The affect of this is no less dramatic than an intruder taking a baseball bat and smashing him in the face and tying him up and rendering him completely defenseless while the evil one goes into his home and robs everything precious to him. I have seen wives and children's lives forever altered because of the work of the intruder. I have spent hours begging men not to do it, not to buy into the lie of the enemy. I have watched as men who at one time in their lives had said that it could never happen to them essentially welcome the enemy in to destroy all that they have ever cared about. My wife and I have spent many hours with broken hearted wives who try to find some sense out of behavior they never dreamed they would encounter in their husbands.

I tell you very honestly- today more than ever I fear for every young man I sit with in premarital counseling. My counseling has changed dramatically since I was a young minister. I spend a lot more time today addressing the need for godly men in the home who understand the principles of manhood of rejecting passivity, accepting responsibility, leading courageously and expecting God's reward.

I spend more time talking about the work of the enemy in attacking the strong man first. I look young men in the eye and tell them, "you will be under attack- the enemy WILL come after you. It is not a matter of if it is a matter of when." It is a tactic that Jesus has taught us about and it is in play in very powerful and effective ways. You must know it, understand it and guard against it. When you think you are invulnerable to it, you are as good as dead. Just as every man locked his house a little tighter after hearing about the Petit family, every man should guard his heart and muster all his strength and discipline once he understands the work of the intruder!

I am praying today for William Petit Jr. And as I think of his horrible pain and sorrow, I think also of the horror that awaits every home in which the strong man has been bound up.

I would say to every husband and father who is reading this- there is nothing the enemy would like more than to steal everything you have, but how can the robber come into your home and take everything you have unless he first comes in and ties you up?

I would remind all of us of the words of Jesus to Simon Peter in Luke 22:31-32:

"Simon, Simon, Satan has asked to sift you as wheat. But I have prayed for you, Simon, that your faith may not fail. And when you have turned back, strengthen your brothers."