the truth about christianity and divorce

In the scripture we are studying this week in John 14, Jesus asks,

"Don't you know me, Philip, even after I have been among you such a long time?"

You can know a lot about Jesus, and not know Jesus. There is a difference between mere religious knowledge and genuine Christianity. Religious folks make Christianity one part of their life; they seek a church affiliation in order to be a fully orbed person. Christians, on the other hand, recalibrate and refocus their life based on their love for Christ. They see all of life through the lens of their commitment to Him.

There is a big difference between the two.

Consider the studies on divorce and religious affiliation. For years we have heard that "church people" have a higher divorce rate than normal folks. Especially depressing is this one that says Baptists are more prone than anyone to cut the ties.

Have you walked with me so long and not know me?

A careful look at these studies reveals that when you look at the "church people" who are actually living out their faith, the story is much different. The University of Virginia recently completed a study that is very instructive. When the principles of Christianity are actually put into practice in the home, this study reveals, the marriage is healthy and happy. The difference in this study and others is that the research went beyond just asking about religious affiliation and probed into actual religious habits and lifestyle.

Spouses who share weekly [church] attendance had happier wives. Spouses who share a strong, normative commitment to marriage—that is, who are opposed to easy divorce, who believe the kids should be reared in married households—have wives who are markedly happier. This factor is as strong as who works outside the home or who earns the lion's share of the income. It's also extremely important that the wife considers the division of housework to be fair to her. A sense of equity is extremely important, but equity is not equality. Women want things to be fair in their homes, but they don't equate fairness with equality.

The impetus here is especially on the man. If a man is living the biblical principles of manhood, and serving his wife, loving his kids, leading in a godly way, the home is healthy and functional.

Make no mistake- there is a wide variance between the man who says he is a Christian and the one who actually lives it out in the flesh- where it counts, in the home.